Just when I think I am doing good or think I am well I find myself holding on by a tread. God knows I hate Whiners, but I have found myself doing it a lot lately. To be intelligent I sure can be so stupid. I went home to Georgia to let go of my past. I shared my deepest thoughts and hopes with someone, but they betrayed me. No, no one betrayed me I suppose, but I betrayed myself my trusting enough to confide in them. I admit I myself was the F*ck up. I held onto something far to long and wasn't sensitive to the feelings of others. I knew it wasn't normal to continue to love a dead man the rest of my life.
I simply had a shock this week. Yes, I knew I cared deeply for this person, but there was always Jason and I haven't been able to let go him. I am better yes the past couple of weeks. I put everything of his away. I stopped wearing his football jerseys to sleep in, put all his things and his pictures away, but I f*cked up big time. OMG I wished I hadn't. But, I know now it can never be and it hurt so bad I can barely breathe. OMG I never knew I could truly feel this way about anyone else. We had talked I explained my feelings and my actions and what I was doing. But, I suppose love and life moves on with ya or without ya!For what is worth I am sorry and I regret my past actions. Have a wonderful and blessed life.
♥ For What It's Worth, You Were Always On My Mind ♥
