How to Heal From Complicated Grief

Grief is a natural process of loss, beginning when you realize that someone you love has left and ending with

your acceptance of the loss. Grief becomes complicated when feelings of hopelessness and questions about the conditions of loss prevent you from completing the grieving process. Complicated grief occurs when you feel a sense of responsibility for the loss and when those feelings prevent you from moving on with your life.

Instructions

1. • 1
     Analyze your grief and determine if you have spent more than six months concentrating on your loss. If so, ask yourself if the time you spend concentrating on the loss of your loved one is adversely affecting your ability to move on.
   • 2
     Schedule an appointment with a professional therapist who will help you work through your complicated grief. Expect her to ask questions about your loss and how the loss has affected your life. Work proactively with your therapist and ask for methods that you can use when you begin slipping back into your grief. Review these techniques and integrate them into your daily life. Speak honestly to your therapist about the issues you face when you confront your grief.
   • 3
     Write about your feelings regularly. Use a notebook or a computer and store your writings. Make this a personal project by Writing your feelings down in your own way. Recount the events surrounding the loss and describe your feelings about each event. Use any writing technique that you are comfortable with, such as poetry, short stories, journals or internet blogs. Share your writing with your therapist, especially if you discover something new about your feelings during the process.
   • 4
     Tell your story to people you trust. Search for people who will listen without passing judgment against you. Find friends who are willing to listen and explain how the grief has affected your life. Be honest about any feelings of guilt or remorse and share your story with others.
   • 5
     Make time in your life for calm reflection. Think about other things in your life, such as your friends, Career or hobbies. Give yourself permission to move on by giving yourself time for self reflection.