Saturday, October 12, 2013

Is It Love Or Lust?



Poets and authors have tried to define love for centuries, whereas scientists have only recently started. Many of us know intuitively that love is a major purpose for living; that connection is inherent in all that we do, and without love, we cannot survive as a species.

But what is love, and how do we know when we're in it? First, let's start off with what love isn't.

What Is Love? It Definitely Isn't...

Manipulation. "If you loved me, then you would..." isn't love, but rather infatuation.

Compromising who you are. If someone asks you to do or say something that isn't in your nature, that isn't true love. Although love does involve compromises between partners, someone who is in love with you will never ask you to change who you are in order to be loved.

Violent. Passions can definitely become inflamed with someone you love, but a relationship with physical or emotional violence isn't true love


Question: What is Dating Violence?
Answer:
Dating violence is described by Health Canada (1995) as, "...any intentional sexual, physical or psychological attack on one partner by the other in a dating relationship".

Choking, slapping, hitting, kicking, biting, shoving, threatening with a weapon, confinement and hair pulling all constitute physical abuse, whereas sexual abuse takes place when one person has been forced to have sex or perform sexual acts or attempting to have sex or perform sexual acts with someone under the influence of drugs and/or alcohol.

Emotional dating violence is somewhat more challenging to define as there are no physical manifestations (i.e. bruises) when emotional abuse occurs. Some types of emotional abuse include insulting, swearing, terrorizing, uttering threats, destroying property, forcing isolation, or being extremely jealous or possessive to the point of where it negatively affects the other person involved in the relationship.

Just lust. Yes, chemistry and physical attraction are important, but true love also includes commitment, trust and respect. 


Trader Joe's???

I made a trip over to Raleigh NC. today to check out the surrounding cities. I was going into the North Carolina Mountain's , but we found out the the foliage was not at it's peak yet, so I hope I am off to try again before the leaves fall. 


While shopping I found this incredible store called 


Trader Joe's



playing charming music and packaging things in my favorite pastel stripes

Over the weekend I popped in for a gift for Mike

(my first time ever to a Trader Joe's)

and left with a little more than that



Mike may or may not be in town for his birthday

so I thought I would have a few early surprises for him

just in case...



Everything Was A Hit ...I mean what do you buy for a 
guy that has everything, but munchies ;)  



Trader Joe's I will defiantly be back again... YAY!!!




Thursday, October 10, 2013

Coitus Interruptus




Sheldon: So are you and Leonard still not having coitus?

Penny: Do you have to say coitus? Can't you just say we aren't seeing each other?

Sheldon: No, because that wouldn't be true. You and Leonard still technically see each other all the time.

Penny: Still, I'd prefer if you wouldn't use that word.

Sheldon: "Well, all right. I'll just substitute intercourse."

Penny: "Great."

Sheldon: "...or fornication...but that has judgmental overtones so I'll hold that in reserve."

Penny: "Fine."

Sheldon: "Just to be clear, do I have to stop saying coitus with everyone or just you?"

Penny: "Ummmm...everyone."

Sheldon: "Harsh terms but all right."

Penny: "Naaah! I'm just coitusing with ya!"

(simulated dialog from the Big Bang Theory when I laughed my gluteus maximus off)



Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Optimism


When I graduated high school I was awarded the optimist award and the other day while at home I looked over the optimist creed and it really moved me so I'll share it with you!

Promise Yourself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness and prosperity to every person you meet.

To make all your friends feel that there is something in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.


No Fear



I had a really good day today, and everything went so smoothly at work. It was actually the first day that Jason was not invading my thoughts. I was on the mark as I should be, sharper than a tack and my work was actually enjoyable instead of a chore or work. I had so much energy and no I didn't have a second cup of coffee or a energy drink which is so bad for me."I Know". Yet, coffee and Monster became my best friends during my residency with all the hours I was working.

Today seemed to go by so much faster and I was happy,content and productive. Today my smile was real and I know it showed. It has taken a few days since I let everything go Saturday at the cemetery, since I took down all pictures of Jason and boxed up his jersey's he wore and his letter man's jacket even the fake roses from the convenience store (just Because) since I returned home. They are all boxed up now  where they should have been years ago. I still have everything in case I should want to look at them, but I won't be wearing his jersey's to sleep in anymore. It will be a while before I open up those boxes ( I promised myself a year).

Well enough about that. I am just happy being me. I am looking forward to a long, loving and productive life without any ghost in it. I really looked myself in the mirror and I saw me Amber, not the broken Amber, but the Amber I was before. My Identity I claim. I am Amber Nicole Wilson. I am not broken but strong and I shall show no fear. I am the girl my parents raised. No more sorry's shall you hear from me, for that is a sign of weakness. I am invincible, I am woman hear me roar....

    

15 most beautiful American cars of all time

We like to think our cars are good-looking, and some of them really are. However, there's a big difference between a pretty car and a timeless design that transcends mere automotive beauty to be considered a work of art. With that in mind, we combed through history to identify the 15 most beautiful American cars. You'll notice that only one late-model car makes this list. We wanted to include newer cars as well, but cars of the past few decades didn't measure up, and today's cars have yet to pass the test of time. Take a look and let us know if we missed any.

1935 Duesenberg SJ Short-Wheelbase Roadster

It's hard to pick just one Duesenberg for this list, but the short-wheelbase SJ roadsters of 1935 are classically beautiful and have well-documented pedigrees. Also known as the SSJs, only two of these cars were built. One was owned by Gary Cooper, and the other was loaned to Clark Gable. The short wheelbase helped balance their proportions and create a sporty look to go with Duesenberg's already stately design. The bold chrome grille, wire wheels, external exhaust and flowing lines made these cars prime examples of the best of 1930s design.

1933 Pierce-Arrow Silver Arrow

The 1933 Pierce-Arrow Silver Arrow was a car ahead of its time. In fact, the company claimed "it gives you in 1933 the car of 1940." Without front pontoon fenders, Phil Wright's wind tunnel-influenced design hinted at the envelope-body look that wouldn't take full effect until the late 1940s. The faired-in headlights and lack of running boards were also a nod to the future, and the laid-back, V-shaped radiator was especially sleek. Priced at an exorbitant $10,000, only five models of this dream car were produced.

1935 Auburn 851 Speedster

Designer Gordon Buehrig had a shoestring budget to update the 1935 Auburn lineup, and he did an amazing job with it. A slick new grille complemented the pontoon fenders, and prominent exhaust pipes belied the supercharged straight-8 engine that lurked beneath a bold hood. Part of the Supercharged Eight lineup, the Speedster was at the top of the range, with a price of $2,245. It featured classic sports car proportions, with a miles-long hood and a short deck that sported a new boattail design.

1940 Lincoln Zephyr Continental Convertible

Conceived by Edsel Ford and drawn up by stylist E.T. Gregorie, the Continental started life as a customized Lincoln Zephyr that Edsel drove while on vacation. A production model soon followed. It was also based on the Zephyr, but it had no running boards and was chopped and channeled, resulting in a long, low look. Coupe and convertible body styles were offered, both with an external rear tire that would come to be known as a "continental spare." The Continentals of 1940 and '41 were the most attractive, thanks to their split-wing grilles and rounded fenders.

1940 Packard Darrin Super Eight One-Eighty Victoria Convertible

In the 1930s, Howard "Dutch" Darrin made a splash customizing Packards for Hollywood stars, and in 1940 Packard made his creations part of the official production lineup. A 4-door convertible Victoria and a 2-door convertible sedan were offered, but the Victoria, with its signature "Darrin dip" at the trailing edge of the doors and cut-down windshield, was more sculpted. A lack of running boards also created a clean look. The Victoria sold for $4,593 — almost twice the price of the Club Sedan from the same model series.


1953 Buick Skylark

The 1953 Buick Skylark was a luxury 4-seat convertible designed by General Motors design chief Harley Earl. The windshield and convertible cloth top sat four inches lower than other Buick convertibles, giving it a low and elegant look. Exaggerated character lines along the sides hinted at the pontoon fenders of a decade before, and the whole look was set off by the coolest rolling stock of the time: Kelsey-Hayes wire wheels on wide whitewall tires.

1953 Studebaker Starliner Coupe

Studebaker redesigned its lineup for 1953, putting the pontoon fender look in the rearview mirror for good. In fact, the new Studebakers' low, lean, envelope body design was years ahead of its time. The range included six coupes, but the best-looking of the bunch was the pillarless Regal Starliner. Known as the "Loewy coupes" for Studebaker design chief Raymond Loewy, the cars were actually designed by Bob Bourke, but Loewy championed the design to management. The '53 Studebakers are widely considered among the best designs of the decade.

1956 Continental Mark II

Ford separated Continental from Lincoln in 1956 in an effort to make it the company's top division. The lineup consisted of just one car, the sensuous Continental Mark II. Developed by the Special Projects Division headed by William Clay Ford, the Mark II used a "cowbelly" chassis that draped the body over the axles, keeping the roofline low and creating a sleek, sexy look. The Mark II sold for a then-astronomical $10,000, but Ford lost money on every one. Fewer than 3,000 were sold in 1956 and '57, and Continental rejoined Lincoln for 1959.

1957 Chrysler 300C

The low, wide and unadorned design of the "Forward Look" 1957 Chryslers designed by styling guru Virgil Exner sent Ford and GM designers back to their drawing boards to update their 1959 models. The best of the bunch was the 1957 Chrysler 300C, with its prominent fins and strong, simple grille. At a time when cars bristled with chrome and used two- and three-tone paint as part of the design, the 300C had little chrome and wore its design well with a monotone look.

1961 Lincoln Continental

The work of seven designers, including Lincoln styling boss Eugene Bordinat, the 1961 Continental earned a design award from the Industrial Design Institute — a rare honor for an automobile. The slab-sided look was elegantly simple, and it would attract the attention of President John Kennedy, who used them for his transportation. Four-door sedan and convertible body styles were offered, both with suicide-style rear doors that opened at the front. The look caught on. More than 25,000 Continentals were sold in 1961, pushing Lincoln ahead of Chrysler's high-end brand, Imperial.

1963 Buick Riviera

Originally conceived as a Cadillac by GM design chief William L. Mitchell, the Riviera became a Buick, bringing a sense of style to what had become a stodgy brand. Mitchell borrowed the sharp roofline from custom English bodywork of the 1950s, but the entirety of the design was unique and a definite departure from the chromed, finned beasts of the '50s. Touted as a personal luxury coupe, the Riviera sold all of its allotted 40,000 units in its first year.

1963 Chevrolet Corvette

Among the seven generations of Corvette, the C2 generation of 1963 to 1967 is widely regarded as the best-looking. The first of the Sting Rays, the 1963 Corvette was the work of Bill Mitchell, GM's vice president of design. The car was offered as both a coupe and a roadster, but the split-window coupe is one of automotive history's greatest designs. The split rear window was part of a boattail-style rear end that borrowed from the past while looking thoroughly modern. The center bar intruded upon rear visibility so it was eliminated after one year, making the '63 coupes highly collectible.

1966 Pontiac GTO

The GTO is one of America's favorite muscle cars, and its stunning good looks are one reason why. Several model years were attractive, but the '66 was the best of the bunch. A 1966 redesign gave the car a Coke bottle look, a classic automotive styling cue. The '66 "Goat" was offered as a hardtop coupe, a post coupe and a convertible, and the coupes featured an attractive flying buttress rear roof line. While the 1967 GTO had the same basic look, we prefer the '66 for its louvered taillights.

1970 1/2 Chevrolet Camaro

The 1969 model may be the most iconic Camaro, but the '70 1/2 featured the most inspired design. The swoopy lines and fastback roof were influenced by European cars — specifically, the Ferrari GTO — giving Camaro the profile of the sporty coupe it was always meant to be. The details were also outstanding. The Ferrari-inspired taillights worked well with the design, and the Jaguar-inspired rectangular grille opening looked especially good on the Camaro RS, which featured a split bumper.

LAST OF THE 15..


2012 Fisker Karma

Crash standards and aerodynamic considerations have homogenized the look of most modern cars, but the Fisker Karma plug-in hybrid stands out for its unique appearance. Although a 4-door sedan, it has the long hood, short deck and wheels-to-the-corners stance of a classic sporty coupe. Designed by former BMW and Aston Martin stylist and company namesake Henrik Fisker, the Karma was named 2012 Design of the Year by Automobile magazine. Unfortunately, Fisker is on the verge of bankruptcy and we will likely never see another Karma.



Why older people work: For money



Being old enough to collect a Social Security check doesn't necessarily mean being able to afford living expenses without a job.At 76, Robert Scheidly gets up at 2 a.m. for his daily four-hour newspaper route. His wife, Anna, 72, coordinates operations at a warehouse one day a week and applies for jobs the rest. "I was hoping that by this age we would be able to maybe enjoy going to visit his or my brothers or sisters," said Anna, a former receptionist and bookkeeper. "But we both really need to work in order to make ends meet."

The Scheidlys' story is increasingly common. As those older than 65 become the nation's fastest-growing workforce demographic -- increasing at five times the pace of younger workers -- the primary reason cited for continuing to punch the clock is money. Surveys consistently reveal this to be the case, even though seniors often find work to be fulfilling and may forget that money was their primary motivation.

"The reasons can change as people experience going to work," said Caitrin Lynch, an associate professor of anthropology at Olin College and the author of "Retirement on the Line: Age, Work and Value in an American Factory." A lot of people can't disentangle that," she said, "even if their initial motivation may have been that, 'I need to pay for heat in the winter.'"

The statistics are sobering:

  • More than half the nation's workers are at risk of being unable to maintain their standard of living in retirement, according to research from the Center for Retirement Research at Boston College. Nearly two-thirds of low-income households are at risk.
  • For most families with members over 65, Social Security constitutes the bulk of household income, even though Social Security was never meant to do such heavy lifting. For those in the middle third of the income scale, it provides 71% of income; for those in the bottom third, 88%.
  • According to the Social Security Administration, 34% of the workforce has no savings set aside for retirement.
  • Social Security income averages just under $16,000 per year for those ages 65 to 74, less for those past 75.
  • In 2020, nearly a quarter of Americans over the age of 65, or 22.6%, are projected to be in the workforce, according to the Bureau of Labor Statistics, compared with 11.8% who worked in 1990.
  • Like millions of Americans, the Scheidlys had always been frugal, and they had always worked. Robert was a welder until his factory shut down in 1987, then a minister."We lived hoping that we could retire, but we didn't set anything aside because we used what we got, mainly to raise a family," Anna Scheidly said. "Some people would say that it was our fault because we didn't plan right, but you do the best that you can in the situation you are in."According to the Employee Benefit Research Institute, two-fifths of families with seniors are like the Scheidlys, with expenditures outweighing income in retirement. And the recent economic turmoil isn't to blame -- at least not fully.

  • Yes, the stock market crash depleted individual retirement plans. The housing crash sucked the value from many people's greatest asset. And for some, the recession added the financial burden of supporting younger relatives.
  • But these factors merely exacerbated trends that have been in the making for 20 to 30 years, say experts. The typical working lifetime has expanded as wages have fallen, and a great share of jobs available are less demanding physically. Meanwhile the shift away from company pension plans has put the onus on workers to save for retirement.
  • In just one generation, the shift away from pensions has been dramatic. In 1983, 88% of workers were enrolled in a private or public employer pension plan. In 2010, only 31% were, according
  •  to the Center for Retirement Research.